All the Things We Could have Been
by joycelyndoesitbetter
Summary: He never suspected John actually settling down. Maybe Sherlock wouldn't have been so hurt by this. However that faithful day on the roof top changed things. Made him realize some truths that he had perhaps always known but refused to acknowledge. He cared for John far more deeply than he was willing to admit, and wasn't so sociopathic as he claimed. first fic. Will be M later


Sherlock had been resurrected form the dead for about a month now.

When the time came to tell john the reaction was most predictable. Anger. Hurt. Pain. Of course he received a couple blows to the face. All of which he took with the With out the slightest protest because he knew he deserved it.

Eventually John calmed down. He gave Sherlock his attention and let him explain, and just as expected John forgave Sherlock. He maybe even felt a little guilty for blowing up at him. Could you really blame him? Three years of thinking that his best friend was dead.

All of that had been expected.

Except John being engaged.

It really shouldn't have been a surprise. It wasn't like sherlock expected him to wallow in grief for eternity waiting for the mad consulting detective. Sherlock suspected he would date, flirt, have flings.

He never suspected John actually settling down.

Maybe Sherlock wouldn't have been so hurt by this. However that faithful day on the roof top changed things. Made him realize some truths that he had perhaps always known but refused to acknowledge.

He cared for John far more deeply than he was willing to admit, and wasn't so sociopathic as he claimed.

The doorbell rang. _Mrs. Hudson will get it,_ thought Sherlock as he sat plucking the tune of Beethoven Kreutzer Sonata. He sat silently unchanged as he heard Mrs. Hudson open the door.

"John dear its so good to see you! Come to check on Sherlock then have you? He's hasn't come from upstairs all day, probably preoccupied with some nasty experiment that will leave my fridge contaminated." Mrs. Hudson explained to John. "Yeah well I figured he probably hadn't eaten all day knowing him, so I was bringing by some left overs of what Mary cooked last night" Explained John his voice floating up the stairs to Sherlocks ears. what a lovely sound, Johns voice, thought Sherlock.

Then there was the sound of John's heavy gait going up the seventeen steps that led to their flat. _Why did he bring me food? Will he ever understand that its just transport? _Sherlock thought.

"Sher-" John started to call. "Ah been sitting plucking away at the string all day, have we?" John said as more of a statement then a question. "I'm not going to eat." Sherlock replied. "Well hello to you to, yeah I'm coin great and yourself." John said in a very overly sarcastic manner. Sherlock ignored him. "Well you can't say I didn't make an effort" said John ignoring Sherlock ignoring him. "A very feeble effort, if I do say so." Sherlock responds.

"Look i am done fighting you. You have got to start taking care of yourself. I'm not going to be here to remind you to eat or nearly force feed you." Sherlock tried hard not to visibly flinch at that comment. Another daily reminder that John was no longer his flatmate and he was once again alone, and that thought hurt more then it had ought to in Sherlock's opinion. Yet it also made him angry. "I know you say that its all transport, but sherlock that brilliant mind of yours is worth nothing if your body isn't taken care of."

"You're right John, you won't be here so my well being is no longer of any concern to you" Sherlock said rather vehemently. John flinched at the cold, venomous voice. Quickly before John could recover and question the coldness in his tone Sherlock rose and walked into his room and closed the door behind him. John stood there a couple of seconds before walking to the refrigerator and placing the leftover far away from the ears covered in congealed blood. "I will stop by tomorrow, alright?" Receiving no reply as expected the doctor walked out of 221b balk down the seventeen steps and out the door into the cool, damp, and misty London air.

Back up the stairs A consulting detective was making a decision. He could attempt to come between John and Mary and get the engagement called off or he could severe any type of feeling he may have for the doctor. The only problem with both of these plans is that one, or both of them would only come out hurt, and sherlock had good reason to believe it would be him.

He had met Mary Mortsan only once. In that one brief meeting he could tell that she was exactly John's type. She was kind, warm, and had a motherly feel about her. She was intelligent (not as intelligent as Sherlock of course but about as intelligent they come) and not as utterly boring as the rest. However upon that brief meeting Sherlock could deduce two things, 1. John Hamish Watson loved this woman, and 2. If sherlock were to break this relationship John would resent him.

And these two simple facts are what will break the lonely consulting detective.


End file.
